
One thing that didn't make sense to me from the start: this girl and her sister are the product of wealthy parents. Why would she become Dante's executive assistant as opposed to being an executive herself? That part just didn't seem realistic to me considering how she was brought up.
I really hope Ms. Fox has retained a copy editor by now. There was constant flipping of tenses, misused punctuation, some misused words. Besides the tense flipping, it wasn't too bad, but it could definitely use a working over.